Wednesday, September 10, 2008

Kim Kardashian’s ass is real

This will no doubt put to rest the rumor that Kim Kardashian uses butt pads to enhance her ass. It’s all real, baby. All 50 cottage cheese pounds of it.


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When you’re a vacuous, big chested, shapely assed woman named Kim Kardashian, a good way to get people to your website is to post pictures of yourself in a breast accentuating bikini and seductively shower yourself with water. Label it something innocent like “Kourtney and me in Miami” so people think that even though this looks like a photo shoot, it’s not. It’s just you on vacay and you’re just naturally that alluring.

Kim Kardashian is bikini-y?

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While you’re sitting at your desk waiting for Friday to roll around, why not pass the time by staring at Kim Kardashian’s tits from when she was filming scenes for her show Keeping Up With the Kardashians. That’s what the camera crew did and it worked out pret-ty well.

Kim Kardashian will be the next Paris Hilton

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Following Kim Kardashian’s adamant claims that she would never sell her sex tape because she doesn’t need the money comes news that Vivid Video has acquired the rights to the tape for a cool $1 million. The DVD will be titled Kim Kardashian Superstar and is set to be released Feburary 28 with even more footage featured on kimsuperstar.com. According to Vivid,

“We are comfortable that we have the legal right to distribute this video . . . I’ve seen the video and it’s really great. It has over 30 minutes of explicit sex that fans of erotica will find very appealing . . . Apparently, the video was shot by Ray J about three years ago when he and Kim were in a relationship. Viewers will definitely get their money’s worth.”

Kim’s rep couldn’t have been more surprised had aliens anal probed him/her at a family dinner.

Are you shitting me? Kim is going to die . . . are you sure?

They are now planning legal action. You can’t stop this. In a week or two we’ll be able to see how much pee Kim Kardashian can take. Not to mention her celebutaint. Judging by how often Kim said it would never happen, it’s fair to say she was just pwned.

Kim Kardashian Out And About In Los Angeles

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